My name’s Alex.
From now on JOE is referred to by his real name ALEX.
DANNY
Nice to meet you, Alex.
EXT. COUNTRYSIDE CAR PARK. EVENING
Sitting at the back of the car, taking off their muddy shoes. Danny has no spare set.
Alex gives Danny a fresh of pair of lush, thick hiking socks, to replace his flimsy destroyed trainers.
DANNY
They’re better than my shoes.
ALEX
You can keep them.
DANNY
That’s the second gift you’ve given me and I’ve given you nothing.
It’s clearly a line, Danny’s about to kiss him.
Alex fathoms this. Wants it. And panics.
He breaks the moment, standing up, his mind on the kiss that didn’t just happen, stuttering --
ALEX
For a gift to truly be a gift there should be no expectation of it being reciprocated.
Danny amused. Mostly. But he did really want to kiss him.
DANNY
Right.
INT/EXT. ALEX’S CAR / MOTORWAY. EVENING
Danny and Alex in the car.
London ahead, lights glittering in the distance.
The energy of this journey is different to the energy of the journey up. Danny’s excited, apprehensive too, clearly mulling sex. He glances at Alex, unsure.
Alex catches his glance.
EXT. DANNY’S APARTMENT. NIGHT
Danny and Alex standing outside the apartment. An awkward pause turns into a silence.
DANNY
I’d like you to come up. If you want. Obviously. If you don’t want - that’s cool. I didn’t mean to say ‘cool’. I meant to say ‘fine’. Can I try that again? It’s fine if you don’t want to come up.
ALEX
I want to...
DANNY
But?
ALEX
It’s a little fast.
We can see Danny thinking it’s not fast at all. And actually Alex doesn’t either. He panicked.
DANNY
Next time, maybe.
He goes to give Alex a hug. A kiss maybe. At the same time Alex goes to shake his hand.
Suddenly Danny loses his patience.
DANNY
You’ve got to stop shaking my hand.
ALEX
I’m sorry.
(a more nuanced variation)
I am sorry.
Alex heads off.
Danny watches him go, kicking himself. He considers running after Alex. Stops himself. Goes inside.
INT. DANNY’S APARTMENT. KITCHEN. NIGHT
Sara’s cooking and smoking at the same time. Danny enters in a fury. Notices she’s smoking and angrily plucks the cigarette from her lips. And stubs it out.
She looks at him. Placid.
DANNY
Fuck.
He runs out.
EXT. DANNY’S APARTMENT BUILDING. VAUXHALL. NIGHT
Danny runs outside intending to catch Alex before he drives off. Only to discover that Alex hasn’t left.
Alex is leaning against a railing, his body knotted with anxiety. He’s desperate to go back to Danny, to try again, but he’s certain that he’s messed everything up.
He’s certain that once again he’s on his own.
In a reverse of the first meeting on the bridge - carefully and clearly echoing that opening - Danny now watches Alex and Alex, now the troubled one, is unaware of being watched, staring into the street as Danny stared into the Thames.
Alex exposed. Nervous. Unsure. Confused. Upset. Not okay.
We hold this moment. Danny is not in a rush to end it, observing, understanding. Finally he moves closer.
Alex realizes that he’s being watched. He turns to Danny. All Alex’s barriers are down. It looks like he might cry.
Danny sees Alex - he really sees him - for the first time. A man who, for all his success, might just be as lost as Danny.
And Alex, more than anything, wants to be seen.
INT. DANNY’S APARTMENT. BEDROOM. NIGHT
Alex examines the tiny bedroom. The jumble of clothes. Danny’s self-conscious. He hastily tidies.
DANNY
It’s normally tidier than this.
(beat)
It’s never tidier than this.
INT. DANNY’S APARTMENT. BATHROOM. NIGHT
Alex is in the bath. A seated position. Chin resting on his knees. Thoughtful & sad. The atmosphere is subdued.
Danny’s seated on the side of the tub. Not wearing the same clothes as previously - tracksuit bottoms and a T-shirt. No socks. Thoughtful but not sad.
Two electric kettles come to the boil beside him. Danny stands, lifting a kettle.
DANNY
Careful.
He gently nudges Alex forward as he pours the hot water into the far end.
INT. DANNY’S APARTMENT. BATHROOM. NIGHT
Danny filling the kettles at the sink. He puts them on the boil. When he looks at the tub Alex can’t be seen.
Danny walks over, perching on the side of the bath, looking down to see --
Alex sunk under the water, head submerged, but his eyes wide open, looking up through the water at Danny.
Danny’s hand breaks the water’s surface touching Alex’s face, as if calling him back from his hiding place.
INT. DANNY’S APARTMENT. BATHROOM. NIGHT
Alex still in the bath. Danny perched on the edge.
ALEX
Had you guessed?
DANNY
I’d guessed you hadn’t slept with guys. I’d thought maybe you’d slept with a few women.
Alex shakes his head.
DANNY
Can I ask a question? I don’t want you to feel under pressure. I’m trying to understand. Can you trust me on that?
Alex nods.
DANNY
What’s stopped you?
Alex entering completely new territory.
DANNY
You don’t have to answer --
ALEX
I want to.
Alex considers. In the end, he settles for:
ALEX
When people tried to kiss me I said things like: “For a gift to truly be a gift”.
But Danny doesn’t smile. Or laugh. He waits, patiently, his fingers in the water. He wants to know. For real.
No more hiding. Alex goes deeper.
ALEX
At school I was old. At university I was young. I’ve always been out of step with the people around me. In the end, I left it so late, I gave up.
(with sadness)
I gave up.
DANNY
Did you imagine you’d spend the rest of your life alone?
ALEX
I did.
DANNY
I can’t begin to understand what that must feel like.
ALEX
You were always sure you’d find someone?
DANNY
Always.
Alex can’t imagine what that feels like.
ALEX
Being alone has a rhythm, like running. It’s when you stop that you realize how tired you are.
Alex not just saying this for the first time, he understands this for the first time, in this moment.
ALEX
How do you admit you’ve never had a relationship? Who wants to hear? When they do, who wants to stay?
DANNY
I do.
A rare and precious flash of emotion from Alex.
INT. DANNY’S APARTMENT. BATHROOM. NIGHT
Danny by the door. Alex wrapped in towels. They’re close.
ALEX
I’d like to try again.
DANNY
We don’t have to.
ALEX
You don’t want to?
DANNY
We can wait.
ALEX
I’ve waited long enough.
INT. DANNY’S APARTMENT. KITCHEN. NIGHT
Danny rummages through the alcohol stash. He finds a brightly coloured spirit in a preposterous glass bottle.
INT. DANNY’S APARTMENT. BEDROOM. NIGHT
Alex, wrapped in towels, on the bed. Condoms and lube on the side. Danny enters with the bottle. And glasses.
They each have a shot. Evidently revolting.
DANNY
Again?
Alex nods. They take a second shot.
INT. DANNY’S APARTMENT. BEDROOM. NIGHT
Danny and Alex are both tipsy. The bottle half empty. Alex is no longer protectively wrapped up in towels. The mood is mellowing, intimacy intensifying.
ALEX
Drugs?
DANNY
I’ve been using them to make me believe that the sex was special.
DANNY (CONT’D)
That the person I was with was special. But I’d love to know what that feels like for real. Because I bet it’s the best feeling in the world.
They’re nudging closer.
Alex’s peculiar sense of humour is also returning.
ALEX
Can we pretend that alcohol isn’t a drug?
Danny pours them both another shot.
DANNY
Absolutely.
INT. DANNY’S APARTMENT. BEDROOM. NIGHT
They’re standing. Close. Not touching. Apart.
DANNY
(gentle)
Will you stop worrying about me?
INT. DANNY’S APARTMENT. BEDROOM. NIGHT
Danny & Alex. A sex scene.
INT. DANNY’S APARTMENT. BEDROOM. NIGHT
Playing with chronology, before the scene sex, Alex and Danny standing, not touching, apart. Alex echoes --
ALEX
(gentle)
Will you stop worrying about me?
INT. DANNY’S APARTMENT. BEDROOM. NIGHT
Danny & Alex - the sex scene continued.
INT. DANNY’S APARTMENT. BEDROM. NIGHT
Back before the sex scene, Alex & Danny standing apart. Their hands tentatively break the gap between them.
As if this was their first touch. And, in a way, it is.
TO BLACK:
EXT. LONDON. VAUXHALL. EMBANKMENT RIVERSIDE. DAY
Close on Danny. Seated on a bench. Looking at camera. Handsome and happy. With tenderness he addresses ‘us’.
DANNY (TO CAMERA)
You saw me.
(beat)
What I mean is... You... saw...
Danny struggles to express himself, trying to say ‘we saw him, the real him, not the facade’.
Unable to put that idea into words Danny touches his chest.
DANNY (TO CAMERA) (CONT’D)
You saw me.
And Danny can see that the person he’s talking to - who we have not seen, this unseen person - ‘we’ understand.
DANNY (TO CAMERA) (CONT’D)
And you asked if I was okay. Not like most people ask it, like they’ve asked it a hundred times that day already. You asked it like nothing else mattered to you. And I thought: How does this... stranger... this person I’ve never seen before... how are they the only person in the whole world who knows...
(sad)
That I’m not okay.
(beat, then happy)
But I was sure if I could just find out your name - if I could just find out who you were - everything would be okay.
Danny sure that everything is now okay. But ‘we’, the audience, should feel unease, that last line resonates off kilter, it doesn’t land as sentimental, it lands as Not True.
Everything is not going to be okay.
Just as Danny is about to smile we --
We flip around to reveal that he’s been talking to Alex.
Clearly we’re much further along in their relationship. They’re completely at ease with each other.
Danny is expecting his words to provoke a sentimental and warm moment. But Alex’s reaction is troubled.
Alex considers carefully. Unsure if he should say something. Finally, softly, it slips out --
ALEX
What if everything isn’t okay?
Danny’s expression alters. As far as he’s aware everything is perfect. With sophistication, he proceeds carefully.
DANNY
Then we tell each other. And we deal with... whatever it is. We deal with it. Together.
Alex looks at Danny and nods.
DANNY (CONT’D)
Is there something you want to tell me?
With MI6 in the background.
ALEX
No.
EXT. LONDON. VAUXHALL. EMBANKMENT. NIGHT
The exact same location. The same set up from the last frame of the previous scene. Except the bench where Danny and Alex were seated is now desolate and empty.
It’s a bleak winter night. A light snow falls.
MI6 glows in the darkness.
We pan across - drifting towards a door - as we get closer we hear the faint sound of Japanese music.
We drift towards this nondescript door, closer and closer, passing through it into the strange underground club --
Over the darkness we hear singing, by the sound, a woman’s voice, tremendous depth of heartbreak and hurt.
FADE IN:
INT. BALLROOM GAY CLUB. STAGE. NIGHT
Reveal a drag act - not comedic - singing a powerful song. A fragile, sorrowful, Japanese man, dressed as a geisha. Singing a Japanese lullaby.
The voice is brittle and female: probably lip sync.
A bright spotlight on the mournful singer. Make-up beginning to melt in the heat.
INT. BALLROOM GAY CLUB. BOOTH. NIGHT
The club is old and frayed, a neglected relic, popular forty years ago, now unsettling.
Danny’s seated in a shadowy booth upholstered in worn fabric. Opposite him is Scottie in crushed velvet. Attire contrasting with civil service persona.
Their body language is strained. Scottie’s watching the act on stage. Danny’s watching Scottie.
DANNY
I’m excited you two are going to meet.
(no reply)
I should’ve organized it sooner.
Scottie belatedly nods, emptily.
SCOTTIE
A month or two, I could understand, I’m not so old I can’t remember what it’s like to be smitten. But eight months of listening to you declare how wonderful he is while failing to introduce us. Eight months feels wilful.
DANNY
I’m sorry.
Scottie’s eyes remain on the stage and the singer.
Danny’s troubled. Watching the depth of Scottie’s hurt.
INT. BALLROOM GAY CLUB. STAGE. NIGHT
The fragile, sorrowful, geisha. Hurt and pain. A bright spotlight. The make-up continues to melt.
INT. BALLROOM GAY CLUB. BAR. NIGHT
Danny at the busy bar. The lullaby continues on stage. He turns to see Alex enter.
Alex stands, smartly dressed, formal, straight from work, a little out of place.
He searches the crowd --
Danny doesn’t wave, or signal, he waits. Sure enough, Alex and Danny’s eyes connect.
With that connection, Alex seems to relax. No longer out of place. But then Danny checks on Scottie.
Scottie’s been watching him. Caught, he turns his attention back to the stage --
INT. BALLROOM GAY CLUB. STAGE. NIGHT
The Japanese drag act, at the most intense peak of the song, more and more make-up melting with sweat.
INT. BALLROOM GAY CLUB. BOOTH. NIGHT
Alex and Danny at the table where Scottie is sitting. Scottie pays no attention to Alex, intent on the drag act. She’s coming to the end of the song.
DANNY
Scottie, this is Alex.
Scottie raises a hand, asking for silence, as the lullaby finishes.
Danny and Alex wait.
The lullaby
comes to an end. Scottie rises to his feet - emphatic applause, lasting far longer than anyone else. With this done, the three sit.
Scottie turns to Alex. A dim spark of recognition. As if they know each other but can’t remember from where.
SCOTTIE
Alex, tell me...
Scottie lets the question hang, we have no idea what he’s going to ask. He gestures at the stage.
SCOTTIE
What did you make of her?
Alex doesn’t have an opinion either way.
SCOTTIE
Too much? That doesn’t surprise me. Danny has always preferred his men to be as ‘straight’ as possible. A tedious form of self-loathing that I’ve tried, unsuccessfully, to wean him off.
Alex is silent. Danny’s furious. Rather than articulate his anger, he tries to change the subject.
DANNY
Scottie, I was telling Alex --
SCOTTIE
I hope you told him that this is where we first met?
(To Alex)
You must be wondering how an old queer like me ended up friends with a handsome young man like Danny?
Danny seems alarmed at this topic of conversation. Scottie notices but advances with the subject.
SCOTTIE
Nineteen years old, he walked through that door, as lost as a person can be. But this is an excellent place to come if you’re lost, someone will always find you, although not always with the best of intentions. I saw him in his tatty jeans, with his cropped hair and his puppy dog eyes. I could guess his sad story without hearing a word. I presumed, if I bought him a drink, that there wouldn’t be a single second when he wasn’t waiting for someone better to come along. What can I say? I’m a soft touch so I bought him that drink and to my surprise Danny talked to me the whole night. He didn’t leave even when others stalked him. A small gesture, but it meant a great deal. We’ve been friends ever since. I’m the person he comes to when times are tough. And they often are. Poor Danny has a terrible track record of picking the wrong man. I’m sure he told you about --