"Pain or perspective, Shauna. That's all that's within your control."
I drop my head into my hands, feeling more certain than ever that absolutely nothing is in my control.
In spile of Dr. Ayers's warning, I decided to talk to Landon tonight. Regardless of the outcome—closure for me or more pain for him—I hoped the truth would count for something.
Instead, when the moment came, I tripped all over my words. Landon's larger than life and had the upper hand from the outset. Instead of staying on topic, I took offense at something he said. I can hardly remember now, something about a man's world, and when I tried to set him straight he cut me to the floor with a few harsh words.
So here I am once again, driving fast through the night on a rain-slicked road away from yet another argument with Landon. And as he has so many limes before, Rudy has come along to calm my explosive temper. He is smiling slightly at my ranting. Sometimes I think he finds me entertaining.
The hum of tires kissing asphalt through water soothes my anxious heart. "I don't know why I let him roll over me like that. Rude."
"You handled yourself just fine, I thought you showed remarkable restraint."
"But not enough."
"Okay, not enough." Truth docs not make Rudy flinch. My car follows a downward slope onto a bridge, pointing me cast into Austin.
"Underneath it all, Dad worries about you, you know."
I look at Rudy. No, no I didn't know. Just as Rudy doesn't know about my scars from Patrice's iron. I've told Dr. Ayers, but not Rudy. He and Patrice get along.
"What docs he worry about?" The relative unsafely of my little car? The condition of my heart?
My heart is even more mangled than the skin under my arms.
So why have I never stopped wishing? Wishing that Landon would only—
"Watch out!"
Rudy's cry comes at the same moment that glaring lights from another vehicle blind me. It all happens so quickly that I don't have time to think about swerving or stopping.
A horn is blaring, and voices arc screaming, and then the terrible sound of metal smashing into metal.
Daddy. . .
This is the last plea for help that fills my mind before the world ends.
He shifted his cell phone to the opposite car and stared at the hospital entrance through the windshield of his car. The parking lot lights were still on, though dawn had broken the horizon behind him.
"She was in surgery six hours," he said. "Internal bleeding."
"Where is she now?
"Private room."
"But still in a coma, correct?"
"Yes." Ironic that Shauna McAllister had dodged death only to end up in a coma. "I can get to her easy enough now. She'll be dead within the hour."
"No. Change of plans. Our hands are being forced. I'll explain later, but for now she stays alive."
"She's too big a risk to just—"
"What's her prognosis?"
"Too early to tell. She could be in a coma for a day or for a year."
"Or forever. Even if she comes out, she could have brain damage."
"Yes, that's possible."
"So she stays alive for now. She's not a threat as long as she's unconscious."
"And when she comes around?"
"With any luck, she'll forget everything."
"I don't do business with luck."
"You will today. Like I said, our hands arc being forced in this, I ler condition buys us time. I'll call Dr. Carver; he'll have options for us. If we have to change course, we do it later."
"What if she remembers?"
"If she remembers, she dies."
Table of Contents
COVER PAGE
TITLE PAGE
COPYRIGHT
CONTENT
I
PROLOGUE
CHAPTER ZERO
CHAPTER ONE
CHAPTER THREE
CHAPTER FOUR
CHAPTER FIVE
CHAPTER SIX
CHAPTER SEVEN
CHAPTER EIGHT
CHAPTER NINE
CHAPTER TEN
CHAPTER ELEVEN
CHAPTER TWELVE
CHAPTER THIRTEEN
CHAPTER FOURTEEN
CHAPTER FIFTEEN
CHAPTER SIXTEEN
CHAPTER SEVENTEEN
CHAPTER EIGHTEEN
CHAPTER NINETEEN
CHAPTER TWENTY
CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE
CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO
CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE
CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR
CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE
II
CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX
CHAPTER TWENTY-SEVEN
CHAPTER TWENTY-EIGHT
CHAPTER TWENTY-NINE
CHAPTER THIRTY
CHAPTER THIRTY-ONE
CHAPTER THIRTY-TWO
CHAPTER THIRTY-THREE
CHAPTER THIRTY-FOUR
CHAPTER THIRTY-FIVE
CHAPTER THIRTY-SIX
CHAPTER THIRTY-SEVEN
CHAPTER THIRTY-EIGHT
CHAPTER THIRTY-NINE
CHAPTER FORTY
CHAPTER FORTY-ONE
CHAPTER FORTY-TWO
PROLOGUE